The Dark Side of Forgiveness: The Tendency to Forgive Predicts Continued Psychological and Physical Aggression in Marriage

Despite a burgeoning literature that documents numerous positive implications of forgiveness, scholars know very little about the potential negative implications of forgiveness. In particular, the tendency to express forgiveness may lead offenders to feel free to offend again by removing unwanted co...

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Bibliographic Details
Published in:Personality & social psychology bulletin 2011-06, Vol.37 (6), p.770-783
Main Author: McNulty, James K.
Format: Article
Language:English
Subjects:
Adult
Aggression
Aggressiveness
Anger
Domestic violence
Family Conflict - psychology
Female
Forgiveness
Humans
Interpersonal Relations
Loneliness
Longitudinal Studies
Male
Marriage
Newlyweds
Offenders
Ohio
Psychic assault
Recidivism
Spouses
Spouses - psychology
Young Adult
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Summary:Despite a burgeoning literature that documents numerous positive implications of forgiveness, scholars know very little about the potential negative implications of forgiveness. In particular, the tendency to express forgiveness may lead offenders to feel free to offend again by removing unwanted consequences for their behavior (e.g., anger, criticism, rejection, loneliness) that would otherwise discourage reoffending. Consistent with this possibility, the current longitudinal study of newlywed couples revealed a positive association between spouses’ reports of their tendencies to express forgiveness to their partners and those partners’ reports of psychological and physical aggression. Specifically, although spouses who reported being relatively more forgiving experienced psychological and physical aggression that remained stable over the first 4 years of marriage, spouses who reported being relatively less forgiving experienced declines in both forms of aggression over time. These findings join just a few others in demonstrating that forgiveness is not a panacea.
ISSN:0146-1672
1552-7433
DOI:10.1177/0146167211407077